I read a small little blurb recently in an article where Mark-Paul Gosselaar expressed some minor irritation at still being called/referred to as Zack Morris. The little blurb, and I’m sure it was just an off-handed comment, had a quote from Gosselaar basically saying he didn’t understand the continued fascination with Saved by the Bell because it was kind of a ridiculous show with bad writing. Well, duh. I think I’d take it as a compliment if I were him because he transcended the cliche-ness that was SBTB to give us one of the most memorable characters of our formative years. And let’s face it, you weren’t really sure who I was talking about until I got to the Zack Morris part of that first sentence. Don’t get me wrong, I love his new show Franklin & Bash, but (because?) it’s kind of like Zack Morris grew up and became a lawyer named... Franklin? No, wait, he’s Bash and Breckin Meyer is Franklin. I think. It’s a little irrelevant, because when I watch I pretty much just think of them as Zack Morris & Breckin Meyer (who will never be referred to by a character he plays’ name because “Breckin Meyer” is one of the most fun names to say out loud. Say it right now. See??).
I know that Zack is not a real person (even if he did play along on Jimmy Fallon that one time), but there is a lot of pop culture knowledge rolling around in my brain and it’s just easier to refer to him that way. But I want Zack, er, I mean Mark, to know that he’s not alone. Here are some more people that my brain will refuse to acknowledge as anyone other than their most memorable roles:
Ferris Bueller - Matthew Broderick is an immensely talented actor of both stage and screen. And he’s married to Carrie Bradshaw, I mean, Sarah Jessica Parker. But all of that means nothing because John Hughes wrote a little movie in the 80s called Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, and Broderick was cast in the title role for the film, and subsequently the rest of his life. Most of this list comes from TV, which makes a little sense, as you watch them week after week playing the same character. That makes Ferris all the more impressive of a role and a performance.
Mr. Spock - Does anyone not? Even Mr. Nimoy has accepted his fate after a rebellion in his younger days.
Dawson Leary - And really, let’s just drop the last name. James Van Der Beek is always referred to by us as Dawson. I think he understands that and mocks it a little while playing an alternative version of himself on Don’t Trust the B* in Apartments 23. At least from what I understand, I’ve only watched parts of a couple episodes. [Creek related side note: we do refer to Joshua Jackson as Pacey, which I think confuses our dad a little when we’re watching Fringe. Next time maybe he should try a character whose name doesn’t start with P.]
Urkel - Not even being pretty hot can keep us from referring to Jaleel White as Urkel. When Charles Barkley got in trouble (DUI) and it involved drinking wine coolers with White, all I could think was Charles Barkley was drinking wine coolers with Steve Urkel. As if Sir Charles drinking wine coolers wasn’t ridiculous enough, it was with Urkel. Oh boys.
Mikey/Rudy/Samwise - Not many people can pull off multiple iconic characters, but Sean Astin not just anyone. He is one football playing goonie of a hobbit. Like my father, I kind of wanted to shout “Rudy, Rudy..” when Sam was running up that hill to get rid of the ring. I once attended a Democratic fundraiser and glanced over to see that he was a couple people over from me. When relaying the story to others later, I had to change the character name depending on who I was talking to as each character has its own audience. Regardless of who it was, they needed a little more information than “Sean Astin” to know who I was talking about.
Josh Lyman - It might be because Bradley Whitford tends to play characters that are either sleazy (see Billy Madison or Adventures in Babysitting) or a variation on Josh Lyman. And we don’t want to dwell on the sleazy. But I think he should embrace the fact that all West Wing fans will forever call him Josh Lyman, because all West Wing fangirls were a little bit in love with Josh Lyman. We are a nerdy bunch.
Buffy - A few things on this. First off, Sarah Michelle Gellar is a fantastic actress. I thought that pre-Buffy when she was on All My Children as Erica Kane’s horrible daughter Kendall Hart. She was so good on that. I’ll give you a minute to judge me for that sentence. Not only that, but she wasn’t the first person to play Buffy. But SMG’s Buffy is iconic. And because of that, she’s always going to be Buffy. Better to be remembered as a badass vampire slayer than the live action version of Daphne from Scooby Doo. Those movies are terrible.
Uncle Jesse - Sorry John Stamos, I’d like to say the cast of Full House, but it’s kind of just you. And maybe a little bit Aunt Becky. I mean, if Bob Saget’s comedy wasn’t so dirty I’m sure we’d call him Danny. And if the Olsen twins weren’t, well, the Olsen twins, maybe we’d call them Michelle. Or maybe if there had just been one of them? I guess we’ll never know. We do know that Dave Coulier can’t be referred to as Joey. Partly because he hasn’t really done enough post-Full House for us to say hey, it’s Joey. But mostly because if you say hey, it’s Joey, we expect to see Matt Le Blanc. Speaking of which...
The cast of Friends - Sorry guys, 10 years is a long time to be one of the most popular shows on television. No matter if you drop off the face of the planet or become A-listers, you will always be Ross, Rachel, Monica, Chandler, Phoebe & Joey.
Honorable mentions (they need a few more roles so that we can see them and go, hey, it’s [insert character name here]):
Sheldon (Jim Parsons), Harry Potter (Daniel Radcliffe), Captain Jack (John Barrowman), Abby Scuito (Pauley Perrette)
Coming Soon: Recently we had to pull out the intervention banner for Sarah’s Dawson Creek, um, problem. She didn’t take it well and has left the country.
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